Adoptive Mother’s Day

April 11, 2007 at 4:53 am (adoption, adoption reform, Uncategorized)

I figure since we are dividing everything up its only fair that adoptive mother’s get their own day too.

Adoptive Mother’s Day will be celebrated the day after Mother’s day. Birthmother’s Day is already the day before so sorry bout that.

This day will be just for the adoptive mom’s. I will be making cards soon. Maybe even some shirts. I will come up with a lovely gift list so you can make sure to get the special adoptive mom in your life just the right thing.

Oh don’t forget this means she no longer gets to be honored on Mother’s Day. She now has her own day so why would she need to just be called a mother?


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April 11, 2007 at 4:40 am (adoption, first mother)

I feel horrible. I just can’t talk to S. I know it is straining out relationship but I can’t do it. I am terrified.

What if he says something that hurts. I know I will cry. I haven’t been able to cry for a very long time. If I cry it will be one of those hysterical sobbing crys. I won’t be able to stop. I will cry until I pass out from pure exhaustion.

I don’t want him to see me like that. I don’t want anyone to see me like that. I don’t want to be like that.

My whole life I have been the strong one. I took care of everyone else. I didn’t cry no matter what. I did not what had to be done no matter how much it hurt.

Adoption has destroyed me. I can’t do what has to be done. I can rarely get out of bed without a fight.

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Lies, lies, lies

April 11, 2007 at 4:40 am (adoption, first mother)

Here I go probably getting myself in trouble but what do I care….

 Open adoption is a loving and compassionate option for you. When you contact us you will find caring and helpful counselors who will provide you with all the information you need to make the best choice for you and your baby.

All of the information except the lifelong effects on othe the mother and the child. Thanks for the heads up about the PTSD, nevberending grief, higher rates of suicide, Oh and let’s not forget the secondary infertility.

You choose the amount of contact you would like with your baby.

When the hell did this happen? Last I checked open adoption was not legally enforcable. Not only that the adoptive parents call the shots. Damn I could have been running the show all along. Wow I must have dropped the ball on this one.

With open adoption your child will know you love them and you will know they are loved because you chose their adoptive parents.

Right up until they slam that open adoption shut in your face.
An open adoption is where there is full disclosure of identifying information between the adoptive parents and birthparents. This means that an adoptive parent will know your full name, your address as well as your medical history.

And here it is hidden behind several links. That is all open adoption is. The adoptive parents get your information. That;s it. You don’t get theirs unless they want you to. You don’t see the child unless they want you to. You don’t even get a single stinkin picture unless they want you to.

I was going to look at the birthfather page but it actually has no info on it besides a letter written by a happy bdaddy.

Professional counseling and support groups for birthparents during the open adoption process and after placement—including grief and loss counseling.
all I can do about this one is laugh, they only offer support groups for adoptive parents .

Ok I guess you can tell I hate these people. Hate is actually not a strong enough word. I am gonna go puke now

And now for my finally which will surly get me plenty of nasty comments….. I am offically starting Adoptive Mother’s Day in response to Birthmother’s Day. Fair is Fair!!! It will be celerated the day after Mother’s day. I will devote the next post to this exciting new holiday

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