Cruelty

January 30, 2010 at 12:48 pm (adoption) (, , , , , , , , , , , , )

Well it sure didn’t take long for the nastiness to start up again. There is a lovely “person” attacking Myst on her blog again. You can see it here but be warned it is pretty brutal. http://mystere1998.blogspot.com/

I shouldn’t be but I am always shocked when I see this level of cruelty to a mother that is obviously grieving. I’m left to wonder why it is ok to do this to natural mothers. I have never seen any other group of people attacked so frequently. Never once have I seen a mother that miscarried told it was her fault and she should take responsibility. Or my all time fav, that she shouldn’t have opened her legs in the first place. Usually it is seen as a bad thing to kick someone when they are down. Not so with natural mothers. It is open season on our heads at all times. No insult is too low and no subject is off limits. Why is this?

It seems that us telling our stories threatens some people. We are supposed to shut up and fade into the background like natural mothers did for so many years. The internet has allowed us to network with other mothers in a way we never could before. Suddenly our story which seemed like it had to be an isolated incident was being repeated by mother after mother. It became shockingly clear to many of us that these things happen a lot. We now have the ability and the moral obligation to speak out about the injustices done to us to try to prevent others from being victimized. Normally that is seen as noble. Not so for us. For us it paints a big target on our backs.

There is one tiny good thing that comes out of all the cruelty thrown our way. It proves many of our points. It shows the insensitive monsters for who and what they are. It is a shining example of how we were and are treated. It shows expectant mothers considering adoption what they are in for once the ink is dry on those papers. So bravo! Keep on doing some of the work for us. We will use every single word against you.

Advertisements

11 Comments

  1. Myst1998 said,

    Thanks Aislin 🙂

    I loved this paragraph:

    “There is one tiny good thing that comes out of all the cruelty thrown our way. It proves many of our points. It shows the insensitive monsters for who and what they are. It is a shining example of how we were and are treated. It shows expectant mothers considering adoption what they are in for once the ink is dry on those papers. So bravo! Keep on doing some of the work for us. We will use every single word against you.”

    You are sooooo right! It is difficult to see that in light of someone pretty much blaming you for being raped but she does prove what we say about how we were and are treated is correct. And so do all of the others who have ever slammed us for speaking out. Reading this has helped and I thank you for that… it was a bit of needed strength to see something positive out of all this.

    How anyone can say that we should have known as soon as we found out we were pregnant that adoption was the logical conclusion is warped and has a heart made of stone. No, when I discovered I was pregnant I was so scared and it brought all the things about HOW I got pregnant crashing back when all I wanted to do is forget.

    Some people just don’t know how to care and are incapable of compassion and empathy… and she has proven the point I made about how humans love to kick their fellow humans when they are down. Because they find it easier to be cruel than to reach out their hand and care. What a very sad world we live in/

    Thanks again!

    Myst xxx

  2. aislin13 said,

    I’m glad it helped you some. I was oing to comment on your blog but I have a feeling the bitch is long gone now. I dare her to come here. I am not nearly as nice as you and your commenters are.

    I am so sorry for everything that happened to you. As a fellow rape survivor I know just how badly your mind is jumbled after such a barbaric assault. You needed help to get through that, not some asshat shoving adoption down your throat. It is plain evil that someone took advantage of the aftermath of a rape. That is what they did no doubt about it. Its sick.

  3. Myst1998 said,

    I hope she is long gone! You should have seen my first comment…. it wasn’t so nice but I deleted it before I published, it wouldn’t have achieved anything but man is she one a-class of a bitch. Its not the first time I have been told to take responsibilty for the actions of others; they do this so they don’t hae to question themselves and their way of thinking. We challenge much of the rehetoric out there on adoption and there are many who do not like that.

    I am sorry you have been raped too…. it is a barbaric assault because the attack occurs on your soul repeatedly long after the attack on your body. And, yes, anyone who takes advantage of the aftermath of a rape, is sick.

    Hugs,
    Myst xxx

  4. MaryReunited said,

    You know that whole taking respoinibility thing is just old. I am sick of this stuff- but Aislin you did hit it right on the head- all this sort of crap does is show exatly what we are fighting- and funnily enough I think we may be winning! Love you girlfriend!

    XOXOX Meggs

  5. MaryReunited said,

    And doggone it add me to your blog roll!

  6. aislin13 said,

    OMG you aren’t on my blog roll? This is what I get for leaving my poor blog on its own for 2 years. Bad blog bad!!! I will have to remember how to add now. Damn Ok off to figure it out again

  7. Mei-Ling said,

    “I’m left to wonder why it is ok to do this to natural mothers.”

    Because she “opened her legs” /sarcasm

  8. Cedar said,

    Can you add me to your blogroll too? I have you on mine:
    http://cedartrees.wordpress.com/

  9. Cedar said,

    Is a rape victim told to take responsibility?

    Is a woman who miscarries told it is “her choice’?

    Is a woman who was raped told that she “placed her body for sex”?

    is a woman whose baby has died told that she should suck it up and count her blessings that she can always have ‘a chlid of her own’ later on?

    Does a woman who gets raped talk about having “chosen” or “made the decision” to be raped?

    NO. So whey are WE told this all the time?

  10. Myst1998 said,

    “Is a rape victim told to take responsibility?”

    Apparently so. At least in my case, I have been blamed for it by the nutter Aislin is writing about and a few others. Somehow, it is MY fault I was raped and that is why I had to lose my child. As a sin for opening my legs.

  11. Andrea said,

    People think it is ok bc they have been told all thier lives that adoption is good and the mother CHOSE adoption, When they hear thats not the case, they can’t wrap their heads around it. That is how it was for me when i started reseaching anti adoption anyway.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: