Blah Blah Blah

May 30, 2011 at 1:33 pm (adopted, adoptee, adopting, adoption, adoption reform, adoptive parent, birthmother, birthparents, cbs, Cindy Jordan Ross, Cindy Jordon, first mother, Independant Adoption Center, Jamie Kiefer, justice, natural mother) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , )

I just love it when some adoptive mom gets all riled up and decides to comment on a three-year old post. I guess they have to let the meanie moms like me know how wrong and bitter I am. Boo freaking hooooo. I don’t need anymore lectures on how saintly adoptive parents are as they rush around the world rescuing all the little children. Do you really not get how that sounds?

Is it really that hard to look at the date at the top of the post? Maybe even look around the blog to see if it’s still active? Oh well, thanks for reminding me to turn off my email notifications. You are at least useful for that

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Stuck

January 30, 2011 at 10:51 am (natural mother) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , )

I have become stuck. I hide behind my mask. I have become so accustomed to hiding that I am stuck in that role. I can’t write. I can’t talk. I can’t reach out. I try to from time to time but I freeze and go right back to the role I have invented for myself.

There is so much inside of me. So much that fights to get out. So many words I can’t quite formulate. My story. The story of my daughter. How I became this thing adoption made me. The truth. I try but it sticks in my throat.

So dear readers I leave you with a song for now.

I have burned my tomorrow
And I stand inside today
At the edge of the future
And my dreams all fade away

I have burned my tomorrow
And I stand inside today
At the edge of the future
And my dreams all fade away

And burn my shadow away
And burn my shadow away

Fate’s my destroyer
I was ambushed by the light
And you judged me once for falling
This wounded heart arrives

And burn my shadow away
And burn my shadow away

When I see the light
True love forever
When I see the light
True love forever
When I see the light
True love forever
When I see the light
True love forever
Burn my shadow
When I see the light
True love forever
When I see the light
True love forever
Oh burn my shadow
When I see the light
True love forever
Away

And burn my shadow away
Oh how I loved you //

Unkle
Burn My Shadow lyrics

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Another Child Being Held in Utah

December 12, 2010 at 10:09 am (adopted, adoptee, adopting, adoption, adoption reform, help, justice, law) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , )

I was recently contacted by a father trying to stop his daughter from being adopted. He has asked for any advice and help he can get. Please help him if you can. Even just getting his story out is a great help.

My name is Keary Watson and I am the proud birth father of a beautiful baby girl named Elizabeth Renee Watson. She was born on August 11th 2010. I want to start out by thanking you for taking the time to visit this site and taking the time to hear my story. I love my daughter dearly and will do everything in my power to have her home with me where she belongs.

My daughter Elizabeth has recently been placed with a family for adoption without my knowledge or consent. Her mother, Rebecca Prestwich made the terrible decision to “sell” my daughter to a family within the LDS church in the state of Utah without my knowledge or consent. Rebecca has signed away her parental rights and placed Elizabeth with an adoptive family. She did this AFTER Elizabeth was two months old. As Elizabeth’s father I cannot comprehend how Rebecca could make the choice to sell our beautiful daughter away to strangers. These actions sadden my heart. I have always made Rebecca aware that I am her father and will always take care of my child. I cannot understand why she would have chosen this option but sadly she has. I pray that Rebecca can live with the decisions that she has made and I seek comfort in knowing that I will correct the bad choice Rebecca has made and will never give up trying to do so.

It appears as though I have a bigger battle ahead of me to get Elizabeth back home than I ever imagined. Over the last two weeks I have been made aware of A LOT of other cases similar to mine. This is prevalent throughout the US with many birth mothers doing this in the state of Utah because of laws that exclude birth fathers. I am fighting for my legal rights as her biological father to get my daughter back. I did not give up my daughter for adoption. I would NEVER give my daughter up for adoption. I am her natural father and I am her recognized legal father on her birth certificate. I have been a part of my daughter’s life since the moment of conception and have continued to be her father in the fight to get her back home with me where she belongs.

Please help me to spread the word and what I am fighting for. From reading other cases it is people like you who are helping make a difference. Again, I would like to thank you in advance for any help you give. Words cannot express my gratitude.

I am requesting donations to cover legal expenses, travel and accommodations in Utah where my daughter is being kept. Please visit the link if you can help.

http://apps.facebook.com/fundrazr/activity/08e22911a5dc42a39688c50f0549fe92

I would also like to ask everyone to take the time to write the Utah Attorney Generals office and the US Department of Justice about my case. The more people start talking about baby brokering/human trafficking by people abusing Utah laws – the more the authorities are going to look into it.

 E-Mail: uag@utah.gov 

US Department of Justice

 

Mr. Dustin PeadUS Department of Justice185 South State Street, Suite 400Salt Lake City, Utah. 84111Phone: 801-524-6924 Fax: 801-524-5682

lfowlke@utah.gov, react@reason.com, subscribe@reason.com, letters@reason.com, rmenlove@utah.gov, bcferry@utah.gov, jdraxler@utah.gov, fhunsaker@utah.gov, curtwebb@utah.gov, kwgibson@utah.gov, gdonneson@utah.gov, gfroerer@utah.gov, neilhansen@utah.gov, lshurtliff@utah.gov, bdee@utah.gov, rgreenwood@utah.gov, pray@utah.gov, coda@utah.gov, daagard@utah.gov, kgarn@utah.gov, jfisher@utah.gov, rogerbarrus@utah.gov, sherylallen@utah.gov, pauln@utah.gov, jgowans@utah.gov, cduckworth@utah.gov, jseelig@utah.gov, rbecker@utah.gov, christinejohnson@utah.gov, dlitvack@utah.gov, jdougall@utah.gov, rozmcgee@xmission.com, janicefisher@utah.gov, jbiskupski@utah.gov, lwiley@utah.gov, ronbigelow@utah.gov, nhendrickson@utah.gov, koryholdaway@comcast.net, markwheatley@utah.gov, priesen@utah.gov, csmoss@utah.gov, ehutchings@utah.gov, jdunnigan@utah.gov, lhemingway@utah.gov, toddkiser@utah.gov, jbird@utah.gov, wharper@utah.gov, tcosgrove@utah.gov, mwalker@utah.gov, karenmorgan@utah.gov, merlynnnewbold@utah.gov, greghughes@utah.gov, cwimmer@utah.gov, melbrown@utah.gov, gsnow@utah.gov, jmathis@utah.gov, ksumsion@utah.gov, cfrank@utah.gov, ssandstrom@utah.gov, bdaw@utah.gov, keithgrover@utah.gov, cherrod@utah.gov, sclark@utah.gov, blockhart@utah.gov, atilton@utah.gov, mikemorley@utah.gov, ppainter@utah.gov, bwinn@utah.gov, brad.king@ceu.edu, kaymciff@utah.gov, blast@utah.gov, bbowman@utah.gov, mnoel@kanab.net, dclark@utah.gov, surquhart@utah.gov

We have made a facebook page for anyone that would like to show their support http://www.facebook.com/#!/pages/Give-Elizabeth-Back-to-Her-Daddy-Keary/123989397664887

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Proud ADOPTIVE mommies and why they should shut up

November 14, 2010 at 12:37 pm (adoption) (, , , , , , , , , , , , )

I have debated on how to address this for hours and have decided that I will just give it its own post. I got a lovely comment on 11-12-2010 from a person calling themselves Proud Adoptive Mommy. I have not published this comment because of how disturbing it is.  However, I don’t feel that I can just let it go.

I will edit all comments that are abusive to say something you will not like. I will report any comments that I feel are threatening to myself, my readers or just anyone at all to the police. I do keep track of IP addresses for just this reason. I will edit out any use of birth terms in any and all comments. If you do not like it weellllll shut up and go away

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Revamping the Posterchild

August 9, 2010 at 11:25 am (adoption) (, , , , , , , , , , , )

Not all natural mothers are whores and crackheads. Most of us don’t get paid so we are just sluts. We also decided to keep up with modern times and switch to meth. Just a head’s up

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Utah at it Again

April 16, 2010 at 1:10 pm (adoption) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , )

I was reminded this morning of an email exchange in my recent past about Utah. I asserted that it was common knowledge in the adoption community that if you wanted to get around a father’s rights you go to Utah to file for adoption. I was told I had no clue what I was talking about and that Utah is not the hot spot for adopting kids whose father’s want to parent. I decided it was not worth the time and effort to continue with the email exchange and have not spoken with this person again. If I could talk to them right now all I would say is …… Oh Really?

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2010/04/13/AR2010041302445.html?hpid=dynamiclead

The father of baby Emma and his mother will be on the CBS Morning Show tomorrow. This is just the latest case. I hope this father is able to fight until his daughter is returned.

Need more ?

http://www.ireport.com/docs/DOC-403018?ref=feeds/category/politics

http://abclocal.go.com/kgo/story?section=news/iteam&id=6480038

http://www.thefreelibrary.com/MAN%20BATTLES%20TO%20REVERSE%20UTAH%20ADOPTION.-a083919493

http://www.nytimes.com/2006/03/19/national/19fathers.html?pagewanted=2&ei=5088&en=baf075e517cb5f44&ex=1300424400&partner=rssnyt&emc=rss

http://www.abajournal.com/news/article/is_utah_a_magnet_for_unfair_adoptions_state_chief_justice_sees_a_risk_and_c/

Cody O’dea

Micheal Marek

Mario Garcia Beltran

Frank Osborne

Buddy Pruitt

Victor Johnson

George McCormick

Need I go on?

And this doesn’t even touch on the things done to mothers who set foot in Utah. Let’s not forget the Baby Tamia case. How many father’s were not emotionally or financially able to fight. This has to stop! The state of Utah does not get to decide for the rest of the country who does and does not deserve to be a parent. This is plain and simple kidnapping

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Done

March 5, 2010 at 9:16 pm (adoption, adoption reform) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , )

I have come to a conclusion. The adoption industry is going to win. I am very sad saying that. It hurts to even type it. The words make me angry and scared on a deep level but I think if things continue the way they are it is true.

You know why they will win? Because we are all to busy separating ourselves and fighting. The industry loves to watch it. It means they have accomplished their goal. BSE moms fight with the Open Era moms. Adoptees fight with moms. Moms in one country fight with moms in another country. Adoptees that are anti adoption fight with adoptees that aren’t. We separate urselves into these small groups instead of just being moms or just being adoptees. Instead fo supporting each other and fighting a great evil in this world we turn our backs on each other due to location or age.

Really people, keep it up. You might as well be working at an adoption agency. When you are done with this why don’t you make up a list of vulnerable pregnant women that are easy prey and hand deliver it. You might as well. You are helping the agencies anyway. Every minute we spend drawing imaginary lines in the sand is minute we could have prevented a needless separation of mother and child, supported a father fighting for his child, changed a law, or helped a desperate mother or adoptee realize they are not alone. You guys just keep it up.

I am going to try something different. I will support any adoptee, mom or pregnant woman tat comes my way. I will help them in any way possible. I don’t care if they were born in the 40’s or yesterday. I don’t care if they are anti adoption or not.(as long as they aren’t trying to make me change my mind on my views on the subject) I don’t care if they live next door to me or in Antarctica. I will help them any way I can. I will fight the industry without sacrificing the actual people I meet along the way. I will not reinjure injured people to get something accomplished. I will not become what I hate

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Odd Habits

March 2, 2010 at 6:34 am (Independant Adoption Center, natural mother) (, , , , , , , , , , , )

I picked up an odd habit after my daughter was taken from me and adopted out to strangers. At first I didn’t notice it. I didn’t notice much in those dark days. You could have run through my house on fire and I would have been hard pressed to notice. Over time this habit became more and more clear. To this day I can not sleep without doing it. It seems like a kinda funny, quirky thing but I assure you it is very frustrating.

What could it be you wonder. I sleep on my hands. I have to lay flat on my back with my hands firmly tucked under my body or I simply can not sleep. Looking back I can see how this developed. It seems almost logical to me.

When I first got home after the birth of my beautiful little girl. My only surviving daughter att the time, I could not tolerate the feel of my own stomach. It was way more than not liking it. I went out of my way to avoid even accidentally brushing it with my hand. When I slept I would often wake up with a hand carelessly thrown across my stomach. The very feel would make me vomit and then break down in hysterics. I would cry these deep body sobs for hours. My own stomach had become taboo to me. It was gross and disgusting. It made my skin crawl in the same way a spider would. I would feel it for a long time after the inital touch. I could not get it out of my mind. So I started laying on my hands.

Wow it sounds pretty sad now that I write him out. Does anyone else have any odd habits that are a direct result of adoption? Maybe I am the only one.

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Cruelty

January 30, 2010 at 12:48 pm (adoption) (, , , , , , , , , , , , )

Well it sure didn’t take long for the nastiness to start up again. There is a lovely “person” attacking Myst on her blog again. You can see it here but be warned it is pretty brutal. http://mystere1998.blogspot.com/

I shouldn’t be but I am always shocked when I see this level of cruelty to a mother that is obviously grieving. I’m left to wonder why it is ok to do this to natural mothers. I have never seen any other group of people attacked so frequently. Never once have I seen a mother that miscarried told it was her fault and she should take responsibility. Or my all time fav, that she shouldn’t have opened her legs in the first place. Usually it is seen as a bad thing to kick someone when they are down. Not so with natural mothers. It is open season on our heads at all times. No insult is too low and no subject is off limits. Why is this?

It seems that us telling our stories threatens some people. We are supposed to shut up and fade into the background like natural mothers did for so many years. The internet has allowed us to network with other mothers in a way we never could before. Suddenly our story which seemed like it had to be an isolated incident was being repeated by mother after mother. It became shockingly clear to many of us that these things happen a lot. We now have the ability and the moral obligation to speak out about the injustices done to us to try to prevent others from being victimized. Normally that is seen as noble. Not so for us. For us it paints a big target on our backs.

There is one tiny good thing that comes out of all the cruelty thrown our way. It proves many of our points. It shows the insensitive monsters for who and what they are. It is a shining example of how we were and are treated. It shows expectant mothers considering adoption what they are in for once the ink is dry on those papers. So bravo! Keep on doing some of the work for us. We will use every single word against you.

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Haiti

January 25, 2010 at 12:18 pm (adoption) (, , , , , , , , , , , , )

I have been trying to think of how to express my feelings and fears about the current situation in Haiti for over a week now. I keep writing and then worrying about how it will be read so I just trash the whole post. Lucky for me someone put my feelings in words for me so all i have to do is link

http://outlandishremarks.wordpress.com/2010/01/19/whites-make-pact-with-god-expedite-haitian-adoptions/

This post is very well written and brings up most of my major fears. Children are already going missing from hospitals. Do people really want to adopt so desperately that they will do it at any cost? Would you be able to sleep at night if you found out the “orphan” you adopted has a family that was searching for them and now cries out every night for the child they are missing? I say yet again, there has to be a better way.

I’m just going to add links that I find relevant as I find them

http://bastardette.blogspot.com/2010/01/its-not-about-haiti-damn-it-its-about.html

http://adopteesofcolor.org/

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